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Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Sissy-Mama


Who knew I would turn out to be the sissy? I always thought I would be the "strict"parent if you will. As it turns out, I'm a complete emotional mush-ball when it comes to the tougher sides of being a parent. Starting with day 1 when we brought Bowman home I collapsed in hysteric tears at the sight of skin irritation in his diaper region, diaper rash on his brand new delicate skin. I had 10 tubes of different diaper cream on the changing table, and probably used them all at once. In steps AJ and completely takes over the changing of ALL diaper for the first 3 weeks while mama could get a grip.At 3 weeks when bowman started getting a bit of reflux and cried during eating, I cried too. In steps AJ and takes over bottle feeding the milk I pumped until we got Bowman some relief. Same story with Bowman's circumcision (which was done at 2 weeks per our birth hospitals policy so not to interfere with initial breastfeeding), and vaccinations. AJ is the backbone of the tough stuff.

Now on to night time eating/sleeping; Daddy put his foot down and has taken over the muddled mess I've made of night time. You see 5 weeks ago things were great! At the encouragement of our pediatrician we decided to wean out the middle-of-the-night bottle feedings. However, being that I adamantly disagree with leaving a baby to cry alone, I soothed him through not having a bottle. (Because his nursery is all the way downstairs, Bowman sleeps in a pack'n'play in our room upstairs) After the first 2 nights he was sleeping from 7 to 5am. He did this for 2 weeks and then started with this midnight wake-up out of nowhere. At the same time AJ was out of town for business for the week and I was stressed prepping for an executive board presentation I had at the end of the week, and so I caved. I gave into the midnight bottle, and then came the 2am and the 4am. Next thing, 2 weeks of this had gone by. AJ and I agreed it was time to re-up, the next day he left for an overnight trip and i got hit with the stomach flu. The thing about these night-time wake ups is that he doesn't actually wake up. I just pop the bottle in, he downs a few ounces and is back out. The whole thing lasts about 5 to 10 minutes. But mama was exhausted.

AJ wasn't having anymore of it. He was concerned about me being so exhausted, and he knew his almost 8-month son was able to sleep through the night, he just needed our guidance. So AJ started Friday night (3 nights ago) and sissy-mama slept downstairs. It's like Bowman is so happy all the time that I'm actually afraid of him crying. Probably sounds silly but he really doesn't do real crying like I knew he would if he didn't get the bottle he was used to. It's weird but I feel anxiety over the idea of Bowman being upset so removing myself got me some sleep and avoided some emotional distress. Part of me felt guilty but the 8 hours of sleep was awesome! When I came upstairs in the morning this is what I found:

They made it through the first night and he's been pretty much sleeping through the night since.

But I'm still a sissy. Bowman, you have dissolved my resolve, but look at you! who blame me?

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